Tag: inspiration

3 Tips for Whole-Hearted Living

by standinlovejen, posted in Beadforlife, Passion, People, Purpose

“The capacity for delight is the gift of paying attention.” – Julia Cameron

Hello friends of StandinLove!  If this is your first visit to the blog, I would like to welcome you!  So glad you popped in!
This is a creative place where people from around the world gather in connection.  It is about People | Ideas | Purpose.    StandinLove represents  3 words and 1 purpose.  The S from Stand is for Serving People.  The I from in is for Inspiring and Inviting Ideas.  The L from Love is Living your Purpose.    How do we SIL?  Connection, Engagement, and Encouragement.   On that note, I am beyond grateful for the group success of this weekend’s Share the Love connection event!

The purpose?  Invite friends new and old into the BeadforLife circle to share our hearts over good old-fashioned cups of hot Ugandan black tea.  The ambience was just right.  The rains descended from a cloudy desert sky, providing a much-needed shower to the dry and dusty landscape.  We filled our cups, and together, imagined we sat alongside the makers of the beautifully rolled recycled paper jewelry that brought us all together Saturday afternoon.   What I appreciated most about this particular small-group gathering is the realization that the women came together not just for the BeadforLife jewelry, but to connect with one another out of a deep desire to be a part of something larger than themselves.  It was beautiful to behold.  We collectively raised over $900 for BeadforLife, which will send 3.28 deeply impoverished women to the Street Business School– a 6 month entrepreneurial training program taught in mobile classroom environments in Uganda, Burundi, Rwanda, Somalia, and Kenya!

Sharing thoughts and viewpoints on subjects we currently enjoy, we practiced something friendship expert and author Shasta Nelson refers to as frientimacy.  I offered a few insights from inspiring writers who have influenced my passion for living each day with whole-hearted intention.

What does it mean to live with your whole heart? Let’s discover 3 simple ways we can start connecting with our whole hearts today, in honor of February 13th: Self-Love Day!

Live Passionately.

What makes your heart sing?  What makes it difficult to go to bed at night and makes you jump out of bed first thing in the morning?  Enjoying a favorite variety of coffee?  Spending time with friends and loved ones?   Refurbishing a well-loved piece of furniture? Organizing your ideas for a new business venture?  Checking a life goal off the bucket list?  Creating visions for future opportunities? Overcoming life challenges with bravery and courage? Learning something new? Influencing others with your creativity?

To live passionately is to live life creatively:  To unlock, unblock, and unleash your creative genius.    Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way has been a staple in learning environments around the world.  One of her many tips to rediscovering passion and creativity in your life is enjoying what she refers to as an Artist’s Date.  This solo rendezvous is designed to replenish your creativity bucket as well as connect you to the things you appreciate most in life.  A walk in the park admiring nature, a trip to your favorite shop, or maybe a drive to a remote location to experience peace and tranquility.  Cameron recommends choosing activities involving all the senses to maximize the creative potential.  Intentionally focusing on what you smell, hear, touch, see, and taste feels incredibly invigorating!

Love Compassionately.

Best-selling author Richard Bolles discusses more than just career transitions in            What Color is Your Parachute.   Whether you are embarking on a new career, entering retirement, or in the middle of a life transition, he takes you on a journey of self discovery, helping you identify your unique talents and gifts with the goal of sharing them with people at home, in the workplace, and in the world.   After completing the detailed, self-reflective  7-petal exercise he concludes with this thought-provoking observation, ” The more you ponder the mystery of you, the more you must ponder the mystery of all those you encounter; every loved one, every friend, every acquaintance, every stranger.” 

Incredibly profound if you stop to consider the implications.  The more we come to understand ourselves at our core, the better we will come to understand and appreciate others.   Why? Because if we truly honor and explore our unique preferences and creative talents, we will then create the opportunity to love others more deeply recognizing their specific talents and gifts.   This understanding of ourselves and others leads to increased compassion and allows our hearts to be full.   There is a reason this book has been a best-seller for over 45 years!

Give Generously.

In Rising Strong,  renowned author and shame researcher Brené Brown explores the concept of giving generous assumptions.  She looks at giving in terms of intangibles like forgiveness, empathy, and giving someone the benefit of the doubt.   The theory presumes  people are giving their very best at any given moment.  She says when we give someone the most generous assumption possible, we invite opportunities to connect on a deeper level.   I believe this plays a fundamental role in whole-hearted living, as it creates space for people to be human.  It grants permission to make mistakes.  It allows grace a seat at the table.  Giving generous assumptions about others helps quiet our own nagging, critical voice telling us to be perfect and releases others from expectations we have placed upon them.

When dealing with relational conflict she says, “What is the hypothesis of generosity? What is the most generous assumption you can make about this person’s intentions or what this person said?”

This notion of giving generous assumptions requires a little strength and a lot of courage.  It means we first have accept ourselves, so we understand how to practice with others.   It is difficult to give from a place of lack. When we give generous assumptions to ourselves, we silence the inner voice, we learn to trust ourselves, and we make room in our hearts.  Making room in your heart is a key component of whole-hearted living.  Creating space to love others.

Please share your thoughts in the comments on any of the reading selections, as well offer books you love that explore living and leading with your whole heart.  We all learn from each other in this beautiful circle of exchange!

Have a terrific week, and I look forward to connecting with you all again soon!

StandinLove,  Jennifer

PS.  BeadforLife is 50% off through the month of February.. if you have an idea or an event at which you would like to share BeadforLife, please let me know, and I’ll be happy to support you! 

 

 

 

 

Say Yes to the River

by standinlovejen, posted in Passion

The river is everywhere.  – Hermann Hesse, Siddhartha

Rivers inspire.  Rivers give way and rivers give life.

Rivers are part of the life-giving water cycle:  incessantly moving, shaping, and transforming.   Cleansing rivers have beginnings and ends, like the famous Jordan River,   washing away the sins of ancient believers emptying them into the Dead Sea where life ceases to exist.   Powerful rivers, like the Colorado River, channel wild, rushing water and carve beautiful canyons and deep valleys.  Melodic rivers, like famed Czech composer Antonin Dvorak’s Serenade in E Major, relax our senses and guide us into calming, soothing waters.

A river is like an opportunity,  beckoning our hearts to listen.   Like rivers, opportunities come in all shapes and sizes.

I heard the concept of saying yes to the river by CEO and cofounder of Beadforlife, Devin Hibbard, during a recent podcast interview with MergeLane cofounder, Sue Heilbronner.   Her firm discovers, invests in, and accelerates great women and the companies they run.

Saying yes to the river for Hibbard meant heeding the call to begin a heartfelt journey with BeadforLife- a global NGO whose mission is providing sustainable opportunities for women to lift their families from poverty by creating a circle of exchange that enriches everyone.    Women in Uganda create beautifully hand-crafted paper beaded jewelry and engaged volunteers and advocates create markets for the sale of their goods.  Proceeds are directly reinvested into program expansion initiatives.

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Beifa Nighty, places finishing touches on the Radiance Collection Necklace.                                By: http://www.standinlove.org

In 2004, Devin,  Torkin Wakefield-Devin’s mother and former peace corps volunteer-and Ginny Jordan, said yes to the river that is now known as BeadforLife.  What started 12 years ago as an intention-setting meditation has grown into an active,  global movement placing entrepreneurial training directly into the hands of the world’s most impoverished women. The scale and depth of this work is unprecedented as evidenced by the recent expansion into six African nations outside Uganda including Burundi, Rwanda, and Kenya.  This hands-on, mobile classroom approach, aptly dubbed the Street Business School, provides tailored business training through a successful network of implementing partners. Devin’s ambition and belief underlie her goal of reaching one million women by 2027.

Challenges

Saying yes to the river does not come without challenges as Hibbard points out.  “We are and continue to be a learning organization”, she shared when asked how an entrepreneur without formal “business” training has achieved this level of success in her organization.  She added,  “We felt like this was something the world wanted us to do…and athough we didn’t have the right CVs to pull it off, we said ‘who are we to say no to the universe when it is giving us something’.”

Hibbard combines a passion for social entrepreneurship and international development with a network of engaged supporters,  worldwide donors, and a team of devoted colleagues working in Kampala, Uganda, and Boulder, Colorado, the nonprofits’ U.S. location.

Devin is not the only one who says yes to the river, exercising courage and plunging feet first into the deep, often unknown future.  The Street Business School encourages its participants to say yes to the river– the river of fresh opportunities where chances at renewed life replace the familiarity of poverty, dependence, and social exclusion.  The members of Street Business School, often rural subsistence farmers living on $0.60 a day, are challenged to trust not only the program’s leadership and it’s initiatives, but also- themselves.

Belief

Saying yes to the river for a vast majority of BeadforLife members means learning to read and write, and courageously stepping into a mobile classroom environment joined by neighbors and strangers from familiar socio-economic backgrounds as well as women who have successfully transitioned from poverty to economic independence.  The program graduates serve as mentors while lending credibility to the program’s effectiveness.

BeadforLife resembles a braided river,  whose multiple channels connect flowing streams of believing, compassionate individuals.  The river’s source- LOVE.

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Ariel view of New Zealand’s braided Dart river located in picturesque Glenorchy.                   By: http://www.standinlove.org

When was the last time you thought about saying yes to the river?

Farewell Fare-thee-well

by standinlovejen, posted in Organizing, Transition

It is a gorgeous morning, clouds full of pre-purge precipitation in the desert sky as fresh fallen snow tops the higher reaches of the Red Rock mountain range standing mightily in the distance.  As we  prepare our hearts and minds to say goodbye to 2016, let us be encouraged by the joy that is found in farewells.

While enjoying my routine, mind-clearing, morning jog I was filled with excitement about the close of another year.  Today is like the joy of reading the final page of a book you’ve struggled so hard to finish.  Some chapters harder to read than others, but you pushed on, and made it to the end.  Well done.  With the next fresh book patiently beckoning, you muscle through anticipating that wonderful sense of accomplishment .

I am inspired to share with you a few things to consider as you cross the threshold into the new space that is 2017.  I believe these may soothe sore spots in your life, and provide an opportunity to create space for abundance.

Reflection

In an article entitled “Clear Your Clutter” featured on Martha Stewart.com, the author gives wise advice about making room in your life to receive what you desire.  She says “that space is a reflection of what’s inside”.  So simple and profound as we take a look around us at all of the spaces we inhabit.  Beginning with our bodies, what do our physical bodies say about what’s inside of us?  Move out gently to our immediate surroundings, and notice the spaces you frequent most often.  What do those spaces say about how you are feeling and what you are experiencing in life.  Do they line up with how you want to feel?  We can take a look at our work spaces, our relational spaces, even our mental spaces.  What is taking up space, using our energy, and do these things help us or hurt us?  Can you pause long enough to simply think about an area in your life that you would like to improve?  Do you long to make more time to read books you love?  Are you curious about making a special meal that requires an organized kitchen pantry?  Have you ever considered writing that book or taking that photography class, or maybe signing up for a session of Reiki you’ve always wanted to try?  What’s in the way preventing these thoughts from becoming realities?

According to the article referenced above, ask yourself the following question:  ” If eliminating things from my life would make space for something new, more important, what would I want? ”   This is a great starting point, because without a vision of what you would like to do or see in your life, you will likely remain stuck in the clutter.  We must decide that our stay in the land of in-between is up.

Decision Making

Best-selling author Tony Robbins opens his  500 page book  Awakening the Giant Within with a reminder of the power of decision-making.  Strength born from taking action.  Indecision is paralyzing, and when you become empowered by making small decisions more frequently, you set yourself up for confronting bigger decisions.  Most of the things we truly want in life are available to us, we just have to decide we want them.   Decide we will take action by implementing a plan that will guide us along the way.

Decide what you would like to get rid of in your life in order to make space for the things you deeply desire.   Do you need to get rid of self-imposed expectations weighing you down?  Maybe now is the time to purge yourself of hopelessness, bitterness, and powerlessness.   Decide and do it.   It is your choice.    Is this the time to donate your unloved material possessions to a favorite charity you have always wanted to support?  Decide to let go of those items.  Ask yourself, “Do I love them? Do I need them?” If the answer is not a resounding YES!, give them up.  You are practicing decision-making, and you are blessing someone in greater need who will benefit from your release.

Clearing Space

Tina Turner once said, “Sometimes you have to let everything go …purge yourself.  If you are unhappy with anything, whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. You will find that when you are free, your true creativity, your true self comes out.”

Purging, de-cluttering, sorting, organizing, are forms of therapy.  Give yourself the gift of making space for the things you would like to attract and enjoy in your life.  In order to invite those things into your life, you must make room for them.   How do you want to feel in these new spaces?  Inspired? Productive? Intimate?  Creative? If the space is full of things that contradict its intention, take action:   Reflect, Decide, and Remove it!

C. S. Lewis leaves us with these wonderful words to consider on this final day of 2016:

” There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind. “

Stand in Love,  Jen xxx

To Those Who Grieve

by standinlovejen, posted in People, Purpose

 

“Part of every misery is, so to speak, the misery’s shadow or reflection: the fact that you don’t merely suffer but have to keep on thinking about the fact that you suffer. I not only live each endless day in grief, but live each day thinking about living each day in grief.      – C. S. Lewis

Whether it was Brene Brown’s well-researched discourse in her latest book Rising Strong, Mikki Wade’s thought-provoking insights during a recent Transformation Cafe podcast, or the courageous and contemplative journey of the Petit Prince, St. Exupery’s imaginary protagonist in the novel of the same title,  the subject of grief and how to navigate its winding path have been the source of incessant mental chatter over the past several days.

What do these three seemingly unconnected conversations share, and why do I feel compelled to share them with you? 

After contemplating the subject for hours on long early morning desert hikes,  I have come to the realization and appreciation that we all experience grief in one form or another, and with that comes the tendency to avoid it and the discomfort it brings.   Tony Robbins writes in  Awakening the Giant,  “people will go to further lengths to avoid pain in their life than to have pleasure”, pointing out our natural preference to avoid, deny, and bury grief right alongside the other uncomfortable emotions we would rather not feel.   I would like for us to peel the cover off grief, expose it, get used to it, and let it cultivate room for deeper love.  We can do this together.   You are not alone in your grief.

Exposing Grief

The holidays are breeding grounds for grief encounters, and according to Grief Recovery Method expert Mikki Wade, grief is a normal reaction to loss. Grief is experienced when loved ones move away, kids grow up, companions pass, and youth disappears taking health, vitality, and ambition with it. Grief is the loss of a career, an opportunity, or strength in deteriorating muscles. Grief resides in the ends of  relationships and is reborn in new ones.  We may grieve a new home, a new school, even a new leader.   Grief dwells in old memories, experiences shared with friends, even in thoughts we project in the future.  We grieve intangible things like poverty, world hunger, social injustice, as well as the rich feelings once entertained about love during our adolescence.  Grief’s messiness leads to its avoidance, yet its familiarity functions as a bridge connecting us through a shared sense of humanity.

We have permission to grieve and the process of grieving is completely normal and natural.  What a relief to know we can grieve, and that it is a process.   We can give ourselves the gift of grieving.  In other words, we don’t have to condemn ourselves for feeling grief.  Grief is not a common cold quickly remedied with a cup of chicken noodle soup and a couple of days in bed.  It is a process.

Last night while watching an episode of The Crown, a young Queen Elizabeth sat opposite  Edward VIII,  her uncle who abdicated the throne the same year of his coronation forcing Elizabeth’s father, George VI, into succession of the throne.  The scene takes place after King George VI’s untimely death making Elizabeth, the heir-apparent,  Queen of England at age 27.  When she asked him for an apology, he replied, “for what?”  Elizabeth courageously replies,  “for taking away any sense of normalcy in my life and for removing from me the ability to be a countryside mother and wife.” The young Queen Elizabeth grieved not only the loss of her father, but also the inevitable loss of a privacy now faced with royal responsibilities.

 

Getting Acquainted With Grief

A dear friend and mentor, Amy Lynn Frost, MBA and MA Spiritual Psychology, published a series of articles on what she refers to as  The Shadow Self.   She encourages us to invite our shadow-selves, described as “the storehouse of our physical and emotional losses, repressed dreams and intense experiences of all kinds” to dance with us.  By inviting these dark, secret, unpleasant, and difficult sides of ourselves to dance, we acknowledge them as partners which help make us a whole human being.

“People who genuinely love themselves have fear and dislike parts of themselves too. They have become self-loving because they have the courage to become acquainted with their shadow-self. After you work with the shadow and integrate it into your “whole self” you realize it’s not bad or evil, it’s just a part of you needing a voice.  The shadow has valuable lessons for us.  We must take the time to listen. ” – Amy Frost

Could simply identifying our own grief help us live more fully?  What if instead of burying the dark, hurting parts of ourselves, we joined hands with them and brought them into the light?  What if by waltzing with our grief, we were able to discover that which we long for?

“Longing is a vital and important part of grief, yet many of us feel we need to keep our longings to ourselves for fear we will be misunderstood, perceived as engaging in magical or unrealistic thinking, or lacking in fortitude and resilience.”- Brene Brown

Loving is Grieving

It is common for me to grieve time spent abroad longing for deep cultural connections with strangers, the chance to converse in foreign languages, and the rich shifts in perspective that occur upon returning.  I decided to satisfy this grieving by re-reading Le Petit Prince in French, dictionary by my side.   We traveled vicariously together from planet to planet in search of answers to life’s toughest questions.  He discovered he grieved his precious rose all along.  His grief caused an internal awakening, rendering him grateful for his love for her.  To love is to grieve, and to grieve is to love.

It was Queen Elizabeth II who said, “Grief is the price we pay for love”.

Thank you Mikki Wade, Brene Brown, and Amy Frost for your courage to explore this subject and share your research with us so we don’t feel alone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chick-Fil-A-Eight

by standinlovejen, posted in Connection, People, Purpose, volunteering

Lafayette welcomed the “Chick-Fil-A Eight” as they have been nicknamed, two days ago from Dayton, Ohio.

A franchise owner of two Dayton suburban locations took Chick- Fil-A’s official corporate mission statement to an entirely new level.

“To glorify God by being a faithful steward of all that is entrusted to us.  To have a positive influence on all who come in contact with Chick-Fil-A.”

As her Miamisberg location, the nations top performing location in 2015, undergoes expansion renovation, her employees were given the opportunity to earn their normal wages while serving flood diaster victims here in Lafayette.

A team of 8 workers, including Dayton training director Samantha drove 14 hours Wednesday to serve while their shop’s reopening date was pushed back.  Ranging in age from 18-23 years old, the team of 8 joined leader Bob for the most difficult job assignment in this area to date.

The homeowner is a recently widowed man living with his pregnant daughter and son as well as his granddaughter age 3.  Next  to his home is his machine shop where he makes his living.  This property is still under water and the devastation has compounded leaving homeowner utterly hopeless.

Enter Samaritan’s  Purse team of 17, including the “Chick-Fil-A Eight”. 


Amidst the debris, festering mold spores, and dampened memories rested an American flag, soaked in standing flood water.

Dylan, a recently injured U.S. Marine now working full time for the Chick- Fil-A franchise outside of Dayton, respectfully folded the flag with  coworker Brittin and  presented it to the broken-hearted homeowner’s son, Trey, in a solemn moment at the end of the day.


Not only had Trey recently lost his mother, now his home and life as he knew it had been washed away in the flood.

The team will return to the site again today to continue the work as well as bring light, hope, and the message of the Gospel to this family hurting from life’s tumultuous storms.

This morning’s group devotional called us to ponder the reason for our volunteerism.  To consider the states of our hearts. Are we here for our own plans, or are we woven  into the tapestry of Lafayette for a purpose much larger than our current understanding?

The longer I stay here, the clearer that bigger purpose has become. It is in these moments of deep connection with humanity that we contemplate our true, meaningful existence on Earth.  These times of trials are Faith’s most glorious chance for refinement and reinvigoration.

I have fallen in love with the people of Louisiana, and Lafayette in particular is making what will soon become an indelible mark on my heart.


These are the moments I live for and I am on my knees in humble gratitude for God stirring my heart to come.

He always knows just what we need, right when we need it.

 

“For I know the plans I have for You declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ” – Jermiah 29:11

 

May the floods in your life remind you of what needed to be washed away, so that new beginnings may take root.

Share your thoughts in the comments if Louisiana has touched you in any way.  We learn from each other and take comfort knowing we are not alone in this life.

Stand in love, ❤️

Jen

@standinlovejen

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Jennifer DeBough Miller

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Love Survives Louisiana Floodwaters 

by standinlovejen, posted in Love, People

Love Gathers.

Each morning, the diverse group of volunteers working for Samaritan’s Purse, dressed in matching bright orange t- shirts,  along with the local congregation of Crossroad’s Church here in Lafayette, Lousiana gather for a time of meaningful reflection before heading out to a worksite.

It’s a time of welcoming newcomers, and enjoying a satisfying meal lovingly prepared by the volunteer kitchen staff on site.  I’ve met folks from all over the United States and while their geographical locations vary, their mission remains the same:  To show Christ’s love to those who are hurting and in need of community during times of distress.

Samaritan’s Purse operates in conjunction with the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, a rapid response prayer team offering chaplain services to disaster areas where crisis management responders are needed.

Yesterday a combined team of 12 volunteers and two leaders, Lenny and Bob, headed a massive clean up project on Demanade Street, an area where standing flood waters still remain.   We arrived to the flooded street at 8:30am, assessed our work assignments for the day and began unloading the U-haul stocked full of the necessary supplies.

This was the scene when we arrived:

Burt and Erline’s front yard at the time of arrival

I was struck in particular by the soaked memories of this couple in their late 70’s and early 80’s.

Water logged photo albums floated in the home’s 4 feet of water.

Their single story home was inundated with 4 feet of flood water while they were spending the weekend near Lake Arthur about 50 miles west of Lafayette.

Albert, “Burt” as he prefers to be called, and his beautiful wife of 59 years, Erline returned home to find what Erline referred to as a mixing bowl of meatball ingredients swirling around inside her home.

After hours of cleanup inside the property, I was able to steal a few moments with the couple in their garage where they were salvaging photographs in albums soaked to the core.  The colors of the printed film swirled together like fresh tie dye.

Love Recalls.

“We met in 1956“, recalled Burt when asked how he and his bride first met.

“I was older than she was, and I remember the first time I laid eyes on her.  She had the best butt I had ever seen, and then I saw the face to match the body and I was well pleased!” 

Coming from a man in his eighties, I found this quite humorous, and appreciating his candid storytelling, let him share the love story of his life.

As Burt retrieved more warped photo albums tossed in the back of his pickup truck, Erline and I reminisced about her high school days and the beginnings of her infatuation with her dreamy husband who she claims, “was not just cute, but movie-star cute!”

“I wasn’t allowed to go to dances, being a country girl and all…” Erline shared in a beautiful southern Louisiana drawl, “so I used my sewing skills to make up some of the prettiest skirts.  I remember the exact form fitting, white pencil skirt I wore that day that Burt noticed me.  It wasn’t polite for girls to accept invitations to go out on the first or second ask…. so I patiently waited for the third time, hoping he wouldn’t give up on me. ” 

As the Samaritan’s Purse volunteers removed drenched sheets of mold-infested drywall from the home, Burt removed saturated photographic memories of trips they had taken in the mountains in Colorado many years prior.  He loves photography.  She loves nature and animals.  Their love for one another in that moment was a testimony to the bond and strength of their relationship in light of the destruction surrounding them.

Love Endures.

I wanted to capture their essence and decided we would take photos under a big Oak Tree in the corner of their front yard.  To the immediate left stood heaps of crumbled drywall,  reams of moldy insulation, damaged furniture, swollen library books, bundles of soaked clothing, along with piles of soiled personal effects collected during their 59 years together.  But there, leaning on that thick tree trunk they were reminded of their roots, and felt the strength of their firm foundation rising up.  This tree stood majestically , symbolically, calling them to rejoice in their personal victory together.  The tears from the morning had turned to joyful laughter as they posed together rekindling the love they had for each other in their youth.

Burt, 80, with his wife Erline Daigle, 78.                                                                                  Photographed with permission

I thanked God for the opportunity to bear witness to this profound example of perseverance, and hope their story inspires everyone in the Lafayette community and in the world that there is hope on the other side of pain.

I recalled the words of encouragement shared in Wednesday night’s service at host church Crossroads,   “Pain leads to pursuit.  Pain leads to passion.  Pain leads to purpose.”

What is the pain in our life teaching us?  Is it a subtle reminder to go back to our roots, and take an introspective look at the things that really matter?

Faith, Hope, and Love.  And of these, Love is the strongest.

Going back today to finish  up and help restore a bit of their memories in the pages of the albums.

Stand in love, like Burt and Ernice.

Jen

 

Love that goes the distance. 

by standinlovejen, posted in Love, volunteering

The rains in southern Lousiana descended on Friday, August 12th beginning around 7am according to homeowner Elizabeth Wedlake as we sat under a shade tree in her front yard on Pilgrimage Drive, soaked in sweat from the southern summer heat, the air thick with post flood humidity. The coolies just behind her backyard fence still full to the brim with the city’s backed up sewage, and the grass damp from continuous rainfall over the past two weeks.

Facing a heap of ruined home furnishings, torn dry wall fragments, and bags of trash, Elizabeth graciously shared her story with me.

Elizabeth and Sean Wedlake’s front lawn when we arrived

“My biggest concern is for my two children and my folks’ home that flooded about 1/2 mile up the road. “

That’s what Elizabeth shared with me when asked what troubles her most about the recent devastation.

As our 10-person Samaritan’s Purse disaster relief team, lead by kind hearted veteran volunteer Lenny Carr, began tearing apart her kitchen one cabinet at a time in search for mold spores, homeowners Sean and Elizabeth Wedlake looked on to see everything they have built up in the past couple of years ripped to shreds by crowbars and a variety of commonly used demolition tools.

Recently married and parents of two children, a 10-year old girl named Maria with autism and a baby boy of two years named Joseph, the couple had settled in this home four years ago.  Joseph lost his job last summer in the oil field business and the couple has been struggling to make ends meet.

Looking out her back window Friday morning around 8:30 am she saw this:


By 12:45 pm the same day, the water levels looked like this:


The water from the coolie, a type of drainage canal, located directly behind their home had backed up forcing them to hastily dig up bricks from their front lawn flower garden to form a makeshift barricade.

Worried about staying or attempting to evacuate in the midst of quickly rising flood waters they decided to wait it out hoping the rain would soon relent.

“Maria went to stay with my mom and dad down the way the night before the storm” Elizabeth told me, “because she is really afraid of thunder and storms. She has a great connection to my parents.”

By early morning on Saturday the 13th, the water had risen to this level:


Elizabeth, a high school art teacher at Nish New Iberia Senior High School in Lafayette, a town of just over 120,000 in the heart of “Cajun country” returned back to work in her school a couple of weeks prior.

Calling 911 for help that morning, she received confirmation that someone would be there to help evacuate her home.

City Marshalls as well as the local Cajun Navy dispatched boats for search and rescue.  Locals took out their own boats and started patrolling the area looking for stranded homeowners and pets.

Within an hour, members of the National Guard arrived to pick up Elizabeth and her husband, with 2 year old baby Joseph in tow.


8 days later Samaritan’s Purse arrived to help gut her flooded kitchen and pick up where her colleagues and friends left off.

“It’s been incredible to see everyone come together in Lafayette.  We have been so blessed to receive an outpouring of support from both Samaritan’s Purse as well as friends and family of friends from work. “

Elizabeth started a “Go Fund Me” campaign on Facebook to drive support for her parents home – as they lack flood insurance like so many in this area.

Field Updates.

To date there have been over 1100 volunteer hours logged at the Lafayette location with Samaritan’s  Purse with over 100 volunteers checking in to serve on day shifts or take part of extended stay trips.

Volunteers arrived from New York, Pennsylvania, Arkansas, Texas, California, and Indiana.

Today I heard a story from the field about a family who drove from Alabama to a flood affected area and set up a tent to grill and serve freshly cooked meals for dozens of locals.

It’s been one day on the ground here so far and I am reminded why I came here: the joys and blessings in service always outweigh the giving.  The people serving from this home base at Crossroad’s Church are united and committed to staying in the area until the work orders are completed.  The people of Louisiana are committed to each other and to their faith, supporting each other every step of the way.

With over 140 open requests for disaster help in the Lafayette area, and 6 job sites completed so far, the need for volunteers is great.

If you would like to help, or have a faith- based or community group willing to get involved , please Click here.  Please pray for all those affected, that God would bring restoration and healing for all those hurting.

Jen

Grounded by Roots

by standinlovejen, posted in Adventure

Arriving at an altitude just shy of 8,000 feet in the splendid heart of Mt. Charleston Wilderness, aptly nicknamed “sky island” by the Bureau of Land Management, I took a deep inhalation, acknowledging the sensations of  lower air pressure and the inevitable impact it would soon have on my lungs.  The invigorating aroma of fresh pine enlivened my senses with each breath, while the cones of my eyes relaxed as a result of the color green flooding my vision.

The days’ selected hiking destination: Trail Canyon, a 4-mile roundtrip lung-busting grunt 1600 feet up and back down the steep slopes of a vast, deep valley.   The winds swirled, creating a ocean wave-like hush inside the canyon area, causing the leaves of quaking aspen to shake gleefully like tambourines in Van Morrisons’ Brown Eyed Girl.   Carrying this tune in my head and my habitually over-loaded rucksack on my back, I set my well-worn, tan Vasque boots to the ground, seeking solace from the relentless summer heat 45 minutes away and longing for the grounded connection time spent in nature provides.

The gifts found in nature are there for appreciation.  A chance to exhale loudly and restoratively, temporarily escaping our cluttered minds filled with  endless to-do lists and incessant thoughts.   A time for reflection, rest, and refocusing.   A time to stand in awe and wonder of its enormity if we open our minds and allow the experience to penetrate our consciousness.

Trudging along the stone-marked pathway to my  planned destination, aware of my increased heart rate, working overtime to supply welcome oxygen to my gradually fatiguing muscles with each step, I was captivated by the ubiquitous presence and grounding nature of roots.   Roots, these vital lifelines of the tree whose primary functions are to absorb water, anchor the plant body, and store vitally obtained food and nutrients for growth and survival,  seemed to connect with me, calling me to contemplate their complexities.

Evidently, roots go much deeper than the eye can see.

I checked several dictionary entries of “root” and liked this one best:

“Root:   the fundamental or essential part of the source or origin of a thing.  Part of a plant that develops, typically from a radicle and grows downward into soil anchoring the plant and absorbing nutrients and moisture.”-  dictionary.com

The more I researched, the more fascinated the topic of roots became.

“People are like trees”, I thought to myself, “and their roots are like deeply held beliefs obtained from an early age anchoring them to a particular way of thinking, watered by circumstance and experience.   Their roots, shaping how and why they feel a particular way, subsist on a diet of both empowering and disempowering thoughts.   What we see on the surface is only a fraction of what lies beneath.”

Digging deeper into the subject, I discovered an article published by Dr. Thomas O. Perry in  Arnoldia,  the quarterly magazine from Harvard’s Arnold Arboretum, which I found interesting to share as it relates to the word opportunity.  

“Root growth is essentially ‘opportunistic’ in its timing and orientation.  It takes place whenever and wherever the environment provides the water, oxygen, minerals, support, and warmth necessary for growth.

What I love about this quote is the following distinction:

Thoughts, beliefs, and actions take root wherever there is an opportunity for them.   If the right set of simple circumstances exist, roots will take hold.   This can be both good and bad if we are not careful.  We can be rooted in love, passion, and purpose, or we can be rooted in bitterness, anger, and fear.    Take a moment to stop and think about your roots and ask yourself the following questions:

“In what am I rooted, and why?  Was there a particular opportunity that happened in my life that caused me to grow certain roots?  How deep are these roots?  How am I contributing to the growth or destruction of these roots? Do these roots need watering, or uprooting?  Am I getting the support and vital essentials to keep these roots healthy? Or do I need some watering spiritually?  Are there areas in my life where I would like to grow new roots? If so, where would I plant the seeds?  

If you have recently established new roots, your questions may sound more like this:

“Am I being kind to others as these new roots grow? Am I being kind to myself during this new growth and replanting period?  What do I anticipate will happen from establishing these new roots? How will these new roots impact my family, my community, or even further, the world at large? “

While I didn’t make it all the way to my intended destination, opting to let the humbling mantra “listen to your body” take root, I was grateful for the valuable lessons along the way.

I would like to leave you with this well-timed devotional entry I savored after returning home from a day spent relishing a slice of the 56,000 acres of wilderness that comprise Mt. Charleston.   May it encourage you to get out and enjoy the great outdoors for a little soul-soothing!

“Sunshine helps to make glad the heart of man.  It is the laughter of Nature.  Live much outside.  My medicines are sun and air, trust and faith.  Trust is the spirit sun, your being enwrapped by the Divine Spirit.  Faith is the soul’s breathing in of the Divine Spirit.  Mind, soul, and body need helping.  Welcome My treatment for you both.  Draw near to Me.  Nature is often My nurse for tired souls and weary bodies.  Let her have her way with you both.”

 

Stand in Love,  Jen xo

 

 

 

 

Volunteers Dressing Women For Success

by standinlovejen, posted in Purpose, volunteering

“Lena, what are your favorite colors? What makes you feel comfortable.. pants or skirts?”, asked lead volunteer and suiting stylist Joanne Steffen, a confident and poised woman, in the most welcoming, hospitable tone of voice this morning when introduced to her 10 am client.

“Purple and black.”, Lena replied.  “And I prefer pants.”

“Perfect!” , Joanne continued, “This is simply a style conversation so we understand your preferences, what works for you and will make you feel good at work!..”, she said smiling with an air of warmth and friendship, connecting her to the determined, yet consciously uncomfortable woman standing in front of her dressed in a pink tank top, black workout shorts and jogging shoes with her long, thick black hair tied loosely in a bun atop her 5’4″ frame.

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Joanne whisked Lena away to her private dressing room inviting her to settle in and make herself comfortable with the same enthusiasm as a Saks Fifth Avenue personal shopper wardrobing a high-end client.    The goal was simple.  Personal transformation and powerful self-esteem building.

Please allow me to introduce you to Dress for Success Southern Nevada.

“Founded in 2009,  Dress for Success Southern Nevada (DFSSN) is the local affiliate of the international nonprofit that empowers women to achieve economic independence by enabling them to build a career and become self sufficient.   The organization assists local women in the Las Vegas valley looking to get back on their feet by providing professional attire, a network of support, and career development tools to help them thrive in work and life.”

Lena, a native New Mexican, arrived in Las Vegas via Colorado only four months ago and is beginning a new journey of rebuilding her life by kick starting her career.  Transition.  The in-between.  Her new job assignment?  A full-time position as an auditor for a small, local casino.   A single mother of two grown children, Lena spent the past twenty-four years as a school bus driver to make ends meet.  “I was able to take my kids with me to work when they were growing up”, she said as she popped out from behind the dressing room curtain in her first pair of black trousers and flat black shoes.  “I grew up on a ranch, we don’t wear skirts and heels..”, she chuckled at the sight of a brightly colored turquoise maxi skirt I thought would compliment her lush, golden skin tone, which at this point was glistening with perspiration.  “I’d be afraid the wind would blow and my skirt will be up next to my face!”, she laughed candidly as I placed the skirt on the go back rack outside her room.

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Joanne’s skills as a retired nurse and President/CEO of a large, national managed health care practice emerged as she handed Lena a few moist wet wipes to clear her brow and cool her neck.   Plugging in a fan outside the two dressing rooms, Joanne continued to focus on Lena’s comfort first,  assuring her sense of enjoyment during the somewhat daunting, albeit highly rewarding process of selecting 15-16 different flattering and professional outfits for two week’s worth of employment.

We zoomed back and forth into a large area of generously donated clothing at the rear of the commercially located office space on W. Desert Inn,  all meticulously sorted by volunteers and thoughtfully merchandised by size, style, and sleeve length.  Racks of clean, patterned and solid colored dresses, linen, cotton, and wool suit jackets, camisoles, skirts, and trousers hung neatly separated by size rounders beside shelves of shoes of varying heel heights.  “15-16 different outfits in 90 minutes?” , I kept thinking to myself in astonishment.  “These stylists are practicing an art form!  And they are volunteers!”

Yes.  You read that correctly.  Volunteers.

*(BIG HUGS to all the volunteers in the world.  YOU ARE AWESOME!  Each life is worthy and you ARE making a difference!)*

Best part of being a personal stylist at Dress For Success Southern Nevada…  no previous experience in fashion industry required!  If you know how to put an outfit together that is polished and professional, mixing your creativity  with the available, donated resources, and have a passion in your heart for lifting a woman’s confidence and self-worth you can join this amazing team!  They have volunteer openings to help style clients, sort donations, file paperwork,  and even help by sewing or letting out seams!

Dress for Success Southern Nevada hosts several annual events like the “Power Walk”, which is how volunteer stylist leader Joanne Steffen first became involved.  “I saw Paula Lawrence, executive director, on Fox 5 talking about the upcoming event and  having just retired, realized I could donate my entire professional wardrobe.” she stated.  ” I believe women need to improve their self-esteem.  They often feel beaten down, and it’s our job to lift them up”, she replied passionately when asked what she loves most about her volunteer work over the past three years with the organization.

We wrapped up the styling session in the accessories room, where Lena was encouraged to pick out a couple of necklaces to coordinate with her new suit jackets.  “I haven’t worn jewelry in such a long time”, she said  while slipping a sterling silver fashion necklace with brightly colored purple gemstones in the shape of a cross around her neck.  “I really like this one!”,  she smiled.  “Great! It’s going home with you along with all your new outfits, your new purse,  2 pairs of shoes, shapewear, and professional tote bag for work!”, peeped Joanne from around the corner as she loaded up her treasures in fresh garment bags organized by outfit on hangers, including labeled tags inside items to help Lena distinguish colors for those she couldn’t decipher due to her color blindness.

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Gorgeous transformation! 

How to Get Involved

Simple.

Donate: Take a look through your closet… Any articles of clothing lingering that no longer fit you?  Lost weight or gained weight and need to clear some space in your home and your mind for that matter?  Perhaps you’ve graduated into a new decade of life and would like to let go of old age-inappropriate items?  Or maybe you just want to detach from a former identity… and recreate a new persona.   Through this giving, you will be both a blessing to another, and to yourself.

“Really small sizes like 0-2 as well as larger sizes 16+ are the greatest needs by our clients”, mentioned Joanne at the end of our visit together.   “We can suit up to 10 women a day, based on our volunteer schedule, and often the women we serve show up wearing the only pair of underwear they have,  if any at all.”

Volunteer:  It takes a village of compassionate hearts to create ripples in the world.  Have a couple of hours to invest to impact the lives of women directly in your area?

Lena, inspired by her new wardrobe which will impact her confidence as she heads into her new job next week, knowing she has a full two week’s worth of new clothing.

Joanne, inspired by Lena’s change in attitude after their two-hour transformation session.

How to Make Last Changes.

Reminds me of a concept Tony Robbins refers to as the  Six Steps For Creating Lasting Change taken from his bestselling book, “Awaken The Giant Within“:

1. Decide What You Really Want and What’s Preventing You From Having It.

2. Get Leverage:  Associate Massive Pain to Not Changing Now and Massive Pleasure to the Experience of Changing Now.

3. Interrupt the Limiting Pattern.

4. Create a New Empowering Alternative.

5. Condition the Pattern Until It’s Consistent.

6. Test It!

“We do not care where you have been, we only care where you are going”, is the guiding principle in this organization.

Jen

 

Authenticity Awakening

by standinlovejen, posted in Health & Wellness, Passion, Transition

Bonjour mes amis!

Well, it’s another scorching hot summer afternoon in the Mohave desert today.  As a 13 year resident of Las Vegas, ( a Chicago transplant) I have come to appreciate the inherent gifts in  consecutive 100+ degree days- often with 12-14 full hours of non stop sunshine!   As a practice of gratitude and appreciation, I will share with you a few :

  • waking up naturally before sunrise and strolling to the park to see golden retrievers and their loving owners enjoying a game of fetch in the cool, freshly watered grass.
  • cycling in the dry air on my very first mountain bike purchased in 1998 (yes, it still works, and I LOVE it!)
  • knowing exactly how to dress each day for months, as the temperature is incredibly consistent!

I shared a little in my previous post about the nature of transitions…. and in honoring the title of this entry, authenticity,  I felt it time to delve a little into what authenticity has meant to me over the past couple of months.   (Giving myself permission to be vulnerable and without shame…. here goes….)

After 10 years in the fine jewelry business, I made the difficult yet necessary decision to follow my heart on a journey towards authenticity.   While I absolutely loved being a part of so many of life’s precious moments with clients , my heart told me it was time to venture into the space of the unknown, trusting my instincts calling me forward in faith .   What made this decision a tad bit tricky, was the fact that I worked for a small family owned business- my husband’s family.    As anyone who has ever worked in a family business environment knows, it has its unique challenges.  Suffice it to say that life unfolds in mysterious ways, making marvelous masterpieces out of what appears to be destruction.  I have always reflected on the beauty of Anais Nin’s words below and wondered when I would get the courage to take the risk. pranaprogram_anais_nin_quote_and_the_day.jpeg

Well, now is the time.  July 2nd I decided to take a risk and dive into the beauty of the blossoming.    I met with as many clients in store as possible  the weeks preceding in efforts to connect in person to say goodbye and thank them genuinely for sharing part of their defining moments with me. (engagements, anniversaries, birthdays, achievements, milestones, and birth/ adoption of babies!!) I have witnessed the love of so many people in 10 years… wishing to express this love with precious pieces of jewelry.

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How blessed I have been!  My colleagues and I have also enjoyed spreading the message of hope at the heart of Beadforlife’s ( www.BeadforLife.org)  recycled paper jewelry in the shop every day.  Creating a bridge between sharing the story of diamonds as well as recycled paper beaded jewelry, handmade in Uganda by beautiful women living on less than a $1 a day, striving to be their best selves daily through income generating opportunities and entrepreneurial training.

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I was reminded at a Sunday service that we most often fear the unknown.  We fear change.  We fear the truth.  We feed the fear wolf, instead of feeding the faith and hope wolf.   Which wolf are you feeding?   It is essential that in these times of transition we give ourselves permission to try new things, and allow ourselves the opportunity to fail.  Give up perfectionism, and fall into the arms of grace.  The grace of giving it a go ’round and changing our approach if unsuccessful.  Giving it a rest instead of giving up when our realities don’t match our expectations.  And like my good friend and mentor always reminds me, “we are human beings, not human doings.”   (Thank you Joan, for this insight.)

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I have been eager to share with you this little poem I discovered, whose soul I believe connects with each and every one of us.

Be the Best of Whatever You Are

If you can’t be a pine on the top of the hill,  Be a scrub in the valley- but be the best little scrub by the side of the rill;  Be a bush if you can’t be a tree.

If you can’t be a bush, be a bit of the grass, And some highway happier make;  If you can’t be a muskie than just be a bass- but the liveliest bass in the lake!

We can’t all be captains, we’ve got to be crew, There’s something for all of us here, There’s big work to do, and there’s lesser to do, And the task you must do is the near.

If you can’t be the highway than just be a trail, If you can’t be the sun be a star; It isn’t by size that you win or you fail- Be the best of whatever you are!

 

Author and researcher Brene Brown writes truthfully on this subject of Authenticity in her book “The Gifts Of Imperfection”.  Authenticity, she describes, “is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we are supposed to be, and embracing who we ARE.”   

May you take a step, even a micro movement… towards your authentic self.  What would your authentic self look like?  Dare to ask yourself.  Dare to do it on paper, with a loved one, or in the mirror.  Dig into a book by SARK, Brene Brown, or Marianne Williamson.   Connect with friends and ask this question to each other over coffee or tea.  I’m on the journey together with you… and I’m daring to explore  passions of connection with cultures around the world- uncovering the commonalities in humanity.

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What would you do if time, education, resources, and self-doubt were not obstacles on your journey towards following your passion?  When you discover it, hold it deep in your heart and commit to making it a reality step by step.

“One thing at a time“, as my dad always lovingly reminds me.

Remember to Stand in Love, rooted in truth, and aim to be the best version of YOU today that you can be!

Jennifer